Talking Points: Unaccustomed Earth

Unaccustomed Earth  

“The cards were addressed to Ruma; her father never included Adam’s name, or mentioned Akash.” (Page 4) 

It seems that Ruma’s father disapproves of her choice of partner. There is a sense of estrangement between Ruma and her father who seems to be in a state of wanderlust. The mother does not write Ruma for some reason as well, suggesting a complete lack of interest. 

“Overseeing her clients’ futures, preparing their wills and refinancing their mortgages, felt ridiculous to her, and all she wanted was to stay home with Akash…” (Page 5) 

Ruma seems to be raising her child in solitude, with a constantly wandering father and her husband being away on business trips. Having to balance her grief alongside that seems rather ridiculous. 

“…her father claimed an armchair in the living room, quietly combing through the Times, occasionally tucking a finger quietly under the baby’s chin but behaving as if he were waiting for the time to pass.” (Page 6) 

More evidence of the father’s desire to be uninvolved. Ruma’s earlier comment about her mother also implies something about the female being the one in charge of child rearing and not the father. 

“At twenty-six she moved to America, knowing that otherwise her parents would try to marry her off again. She lived on Long Island, an anomaly, an Indian woman alone.” (Page 8) 

Here there are some insights to Indian culture, with women taking on a domestic role and having to be married. Another culture that perpetuates the image of the subservient woman. 

Hell-Heaven  

“The answer to his question was clear, given that my mother was wearing the red and white bangles unique to Bengali married women, and a common Tangail sari, and had a thick stem of vermillion powder in the center parting of her hair…” (Page 61) 

There is an indicator of attire denoting a person’s status. It brings to mind the caste system in India, where one’s position is determined and locked, with little room to advance. 

“He was stunned that my second-grade teacher didn’t assign any homework and that at the age of seven I hadn’t yet been taught square roots or the concept of pi.” (Page 63) 

The emphasis in education is different between countries and explains Pranab Kaku’s carefree attitude regarding his colleagues at MIT. It’s another reminder of how foreign America is to Kaku. Another statement that he is no longer home. 

“…Pranab Kaku’s visits were what my mother looked forward to all day, that she changed into a new sari and combed her hair in anticipation of his arrival…” (Page 63) 

There are some implications to the loneliness experienced by the narrator’s mother. The fact that she is willing to change her attire on a daily basis, being in a foul mood when Kaku doesn’t visit, and other acts might be a symptom of homesickness. 

“Because he played the part of a younger brother, she felt free to call him Pranab, whereas she never called my father by his first name.” (Page 65) 

The narrator’s mother misses her home country while it seems her husband is of a different mind. He doesn’t seem to practice the same traditions as the narrator’s mother. As a result, she latches on to Kaku as her only outlet to talk about her homeland. 

A Choice of Accommodations  

“He couldn’t imagine sending his daughters to Langford—couldn’t imagine letting go of them as his parents had let go of him.” (Page 86) 

Amit’s comments about his parents staying in India really make him feel hurt. This is why despite his daughters being sent to another person’s place while Amit and Megan attend the wedding, he keeps looking into the back seats of the car. He feels abandoned by his parents who never attended his graduation and he doesn’t want to do the same to his daughters. 

“These everyday rituals felt like a chore. He was uninspired to put on his suit and socialize with ghosts from his adolescence.” (Page 89) 

For Megan as well, Amit’s past with Pam is another point of contention for their relationship. For Megan, Pam is a secret of Amit’s life that he is unwilling to divulge. For Amit, it is a constant reminder of his time away from his family and the pain of feeling abandoned. 

“It was Amit who had studied enough about the body to know its inherent fragility…” (Page 90) 

Knowledge is this instance is a burden. Being the editor for a medical journal, Amit is constantly worrying about his daughter’s well-being. Along with that, it is a contrast to Megan’s carefree style of raising their daughters. 

“Both Maya and Monika had inherited Megan’s coloring, without a trace of Amit’s deeply tan skin and black eyes, so that apart from their vaguely Indian names they appeared fully American.” (Page 94) 

Interracial relations show up again as another point of contention. For Amit, it is another stark reminder that he feels out of place in America. It also makes others question his presence in other places. 

Only Goodness  

“The idea of excess, of being out of control, did not appeal to Sudha. Competence: this was the trait that fundamentally defined her.” (Page 129) 

Sudha unlike most who rebel against their parents, exercises moderation when indulging in parties and drinking. In a sense, despite her desire to be free of her parents, the sense of control is something that remains instilled in her. 

“For years they had been compared to other Bengali children, told about gold medals brought back from science fairs, colleges that offered full scholarships.” (Page 129) 

One other way in which parents push their children is to compare them to children of other families. The results are often mixed, with children often finding that they don’t meet those expectations and those who do still remained compared to the other child. It is a never ending critique of one’s self-worth. 

“Her parents told her that half the rentals in London in the sixties said WHITES ONLY, and the combination of being Indian and pregnant limited her parents to the point where her father considered sending her mother back to India to give birth…” (Page 135) 

I do know the whites only signs that appeared in America and was one of the reasons why the Civil Rights movement began. It is a surprise to hear that it occurred in London as well.  

“…the perplexing fact of her parents’ marriage. It was neither happy nor unhappy, and the lack of emotion in either extreme was what upset Sudha most.” (Page 137) 

This is another facet of Sudha seeming restraint. Along with Rahul’s comments that she has become boring to him, Sudha is taking on more aspects of her parents as she grows older. It’s also an indicator of the type of restraint that Sudha wanted to leave when she headed to university. 

Nobody’s Business  

“In Sang’s opinion it was practically an arranged marriage. These men weren’t really interested in her. They were interested in a mythical creature created by an intricate chain of gossip, a web of wishful Indian community thinking…” (Page 176) 

Sang in this description of herself portrays herself as having lost her own sense of agency. Many of the details potential suitors use to describe her are false and shows the extent through which they actually know her. Is this an effort by her own parents and if so, is an indicator of how much marriage seems to equal prestige for women? 

“…she told him that after she had dropped out of Harvard a year ago, her mother locked herself up in her bedroom for a week and her father refused to speak to her.” (Page 181) 

Sang seems to go against the trend of being studious and devoted to education. Badgered by suitors about her hand in marriage, it appears that this is Sang’s parents thinking that this the only way she can remain relevant. Having left Harvard, her parents are arranging suitors for Sang and still exuding a presence on her life. 

“Why didn’t he ever want to meet her friends? Why didn’t he invite her to his cousin’s house for Thanksgiving? Why didn’t he like to spend the night together? Why, at the very least, didn’t he drive her home?” (Page 189) 

Sang desires some form of intimacy, having been cut off from her parents as a result of her actions. Farouk on the other hand seems extremely casual when it comes to their relationship. 

“But then, one day when he called, Heather, holed up in the house that week to study for an exam, happened to answer and said, “She’s left the country,” putting an end to Farouk’s calls.” (Page 215) 

Thus ends what read to me like one of mom’s Filipino dramas that she watches. One the other hand however, I think that Sang tried her hardest to find happiness and the beating from Farouk was the last straw that went over the line. 

Part 2 Hema and Kaushik 

Once in a Lifetime  

Second person point of view again. Will this be accusatory or another dive into the life of someone who lives in that culture? 

“They talked about the lives they had left behind in Calcutta: your mother’s beautiful home in Jodhpur Park, with hibiscus and rosebushes blooming on the rooftop, and my mother’s modest flat in Maniktala, above a grimy Punjabi restaurant, where seven people existed in three small rooms.” (Page 225)
 

There seems to be a disparity in the social status of the two women. It makes me wonder why they both chose to give up that life and what problems they encountered. 

“…your father made countless trips to drive people home, taking one couple as far as Braintree, claiming that it was no trouble, that this was his last opportunity to drive the car.” (Page 225) 

It seems that interactions with other people is limited. On one hand, I am unfamiliar with how hospitality is handled and this might just be an extension of good manners by the host. 

“I was about to step off coatless, but then someone cried out, “Hey, Hema, you forgot this!” I was startled that anyone on that bus knew my name; I had forgotten about the name tag.” (Page 227) 

One interpretation of this is that Hema does not like herself as she constantly compares herself to other girls based on their sweater alone. Hema finds herself wanting to fit in, and the jacket is a barrier to acceptance by her peers. 

Year’s End  

The narrator is still Kaushik, interesting that it remains as a male point of view. Now however, we have Kaushik’s thoughts instead of Hema narrating at the reader. An interesting development of the story that is occuring here. 

“Since my mother’s death, I frequently doubted things my father said in the course of our telephone conversations…” (Page 254) 

Kaushik’s father is affected by his wife’s death. The warmth and chatter were something that was missed. Having to watch someone so energetic die slowly day by day is a draining experience for sure. 

“The arrangement of the bowls, small glass bowls in which we normally had ice cream, felt too formal for me. This was the old-fashioned, ceremonious way I remembered my grandfathers eating in Calcutta, being treated each day like kings after their morning baths.” (Page 261) 

Here is a glimpse at food culture. One comment I can remember is that civilization started with the kitchen. That was due to the gathering of people for food and the subsequent rituals that were developed in response to the influx of people. 

“They spoke to me in English, their accents and their intonation sounding as severe as mine must have sounded to your fully American ear when we arrived as refugees in your family’s home.” (Page 263) 

I’m only assuming that the you this time is Hema, as a continuation of the banter from the previous chapter. The commentary about accents reminds me again of FOBs and their tendency to stand out. For Rupa and Piu, the accent will fade in time as they interact more with others. 

Going Ashore  

“Her scholarly life was a mystery to them, something at once impressive and irrelevant. It had earned her a PhD and a tenure-track job, that was the important thing.” (Page 294) 

Another instance of where the emphasis on education trumps other forms of success for the parents. Hema though maintains a distance from her parents. 

“And it had touched her to be treated, at thirty-seven, like a teenaged girl. She had not had a boyfriend until she was in graduate school, and by then she was too old for such measured advances from men.” (Page 297) 

It makes me wonder if her parents had any influence for the timing in Hema having a boyfriend only in graduate school? Considering that in A Choice of Accommodations, Megan was in her forties and married to Amit, Hema’s worries about her age are influenced by the image of a woman in Indian society. The image consisting of a domestic housewife that is educated and being married. 

“She was alone with her work, alone abroad for the first time in her life, aware that her solitary existence was about to end.” (Page 298) 

Hema’s separation from her family in a physical sense drives Hema for a form of company. In Nevin she finds that. There is also the line in Unaccustomed Earth in which an Indian woman living alone was an anomaly. It brings back a theme from the beginning of the book, making this final story a cyclical one. 

“Like the young smiling couple sitting affectionately on top of a shared casket, there was something dead about the marriage she was about to enter into.” (Page 301) 

This line gives me a sense of foreboding. Hema likens her upcoming marriage to a corpse, something lifeless and decaying. Perhaps she views the commitment to her relationship a barrier to her joy in studying Latin.