Angelica's A-POP Blog

Part One

1. Unaccustomed Earth
   1. P. 5
      1. After the two weeks Ruma received for bereavement…and Fridays but every day.
         1. I’ve heard of stories like these before. Everything from someone preparing the dead and then preparing their own, to lawyers being sued and fighting for their rights rather than someone else’s.
   2. P. 7
      1. She couldn’t imagine tending to her father as her mother had, serving the meals her mother used to prepare.
         1. When I was about 14 years old I started to cook for myself and by age 15 my mother would expect me to cook for my father. Not because she was too busy, but because she told me that the man must always be fed and she would scold me if I didn’t. I still wouldn’t.
   3. P. 17
      1. He would know nothing of the weeks her mother…items of her mother’s Ruma had kept.
         1. I get that Ruma is upset that her children will never get to meet or talk to their grandmother, but hiding her in this little box and saying “he will never this,” “he will never that,” it just kills her memory more, rather than expressing to them what kind of person she IS and not what he will never know.
   4. P. 20
      1. It was the same hospital where Ruma had been a candy…after Romi broke his arm on a soccer field.
         1. My mom was once a candy striper as well.
   5. P. 21
      1. “You spent three weeks in Italy and all you ate was pizza?” “It was quite tasty pizza.”
         1. Same. While I was in Japan all I wanted was ramen, rice, and sweet drinks.
2. Hell-Heaven
   1. P. 60
      1. Pranab Chakraborty wasn’t technically my father’s…I was taught to call him Pranab Kaku.
         1. The uncle and aunt that I know the most in my life are actually the children of my grandmother’s best friend. Friendships lasting generations.
   2. P. 62
      1. He was from a wealthy family in Calcutta and had…he lost nearly twenty pounds.
         1. I hate parents that do this so much. They prepare their child for their future career, but not their future well being. Sure, someone can pay for your education, who is going to tell you how to budget your money once you have it?
   3. P. 64-65
      1. …and even in her bleakest hours of homesickness…a single painting hanging on the walls.
         1. I’m not sure if this reference pertains to his family being Muslim, her being of a lower caste, or that she would be treated as an outsider.
   4. P. 68
      1. “In a few weeks, the fun will be over and…Bengali with the exception of her.
         1. I remember my mother-in-law being like this when my boyfriend and I first started dating. Hoping for things to end quickly.
   5. P. 72
      1. In the face of this refusal, Pranab Kaku shrugged, “I don’t care. Not everyone can be ad open-minded as you,” he told my parents. “Your blessing is blessing enough.”
         1. Also,a similar reaction when we started to move in together. My father said yes. They said no.
3. A Choice of Accommodations
   1. P. 88
      1. “You never know,” Megan said. “A lot of women do things out of character on their wedding day. Even women like Pam.”
         1. I’m guessing that these two have a history together and while there’s nothing wrong with going to an old flame’s wedding if you’re invited, it is wrong to talk about how you know them so well to your current wife/girlfriend.
   2. P. 90
      1. He knew that it was partly out of guilt that she tended…elbow or a hundred-degree fever.
         1. I lean towards the “let your kid eat some dirt,” side, but having a child break out in a fever and general worriment is still important in any good parent.
   3. P.90-91
      1. When he read articles in the newspaper about taxis…holding Monika and Maya by the hand.
         1. My father has this same worry. He would always push my mother and sister to the inside of the street and later would judge my sister’s and I’s boyfriends if they did the same or not.
   4. P. 95
      1. She was the youngest of five children, her father a policeman, her mother a kindergarten teacher.
         1. Both jobs to the community and yet so poorly paid.
   5. P. 100
      1. Only once had Amit worked up the nerve to…was doing and pay them his full attention.
         1. Even though Pam told him no and that things would never work out, I hate this pull, back and forth, between the two of them. They clearly have a connection with each other, but just one that I guess will never be.
4. Only Goodness
   1. P. 128
      1. He’d pronounced both beverages revolting, preferring…her little brother in name only.
         1. How old was Rahul when he had this first drink? Some children end up craving alcohol from an early age when parents or siblings do this.
   2. P. 129-130
      1. Sometimes Sudha’s father would clip…and tape them to the refrigerator.
         1. For me, it was a 12-year-old girl who could perform surgery on animals and had her degree by age 10.
   3. P. 139
      1. Instead, they were people he met working at the restaurant, people he never bothered to invite home.
         1. My sister had these kinds of people in her life. Most of them were alright, but some of them were into heavy drugs.
   4. P. 142-143
      1. They probably stopped him just for being Indian.
         1. Both my mother and sister were pulled over a few years by an officer in Minnesota because “you don’t look like you can afford this car.”
5. Nobody’s Business
   1. P. 177
      1. It wasn’t until she wrote out a check for her…in the window of the electric bill she agreed to take on.
         1. I’ve had friends in the past that address themselves with their full name and then nicknames that you end up calling them. In some cases, you don’t learn their full name or actual name until years later. For example, I didn’t know that my grandma’s name was actually Gertrude because, for years, she only answered to Bobbie.
   2. P. 179
      1. “He still doesn’t want to live together until you’re married?” She shook her head. “What does he say?” “That he doesn’t want to spoil things.”
         1. “Spoil things,” is an interesting way of putting it. I’ve heard religions or financial reasons for not moving in together, but spoiling things is a new one. If anything, if you can’t live moving in together, picking out items, and addressing how pays for what, you might not make it once you’ve tied the knot.
   3. P. 182
      1. Paul had walked home, the tie he’d brought for the…the department secretary asked him if he’d fallen in love.
         1. Depression and burn out are some of the hardest things that students have to live through in order to get their degree. I’m not too sure how someone could guess that love could make someone look visually unhealthy, especially with weight loss, but to me, this just adds to the stigma that stress is normal and widely overlooked.
   4. P. 197-198
      1. She told Paul that she was from Vancouver originally…hour ago, I could feel him dripping down my thighs.”
         1. I feel for Deirdre in these moments, wanting to believe that Sang is actually “the other woman,” but lowering herself to counting the time he spent with her is just a waste. Rather than leaving him now, she wants to make it seem like she IS the better of the two. Frankly, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were dozens of other women who he just texts and flirts with besides them, who also think their relationship is serious.

Part Two: Hema and Kaushik

1. Once in a Lifetime
   1. P. 225
      1. They became instant friends, spending their days…chair, pushed along the streets in your old pram.
         1. I’ve always found it interesting how these relationships form and then last a lifetime. My mother has this kind of relationship with a woman that I am proud to call my aunt. I wonder if a friendship like this is in my future.
   2. P. 226
      1. I found these clothes ugly and tried to avoid them, but…she’d got from her subscription to Good Housekeeping.
         1. I’ve had a similar experience with this. Once upon a time when I would wear jeans, I got a cut near my knee and wanted to have it sewn shut. Rather than doing this, my mother sewed a big patch right over the knee. I hated it because I thought it was ugly and ended up throwing the jeans away when I found out that she, in fact, ironed the patch on.
   3. P. 229
      1. My mother considered the idea of a child sleeping…married and that this was perfectly normal.
         1. While Hema’s mother is correct that children sleeping alone is an American practice, I don’t find it be cruel and actually better for the child later on in life. I think children need this space away from their parents so they can grow and make their new families, rather than running back to the nest.
   4. P. 235
      1. “I bet most Americans had never even heard of Iran before this,” you said, causing me to feel responsible both for my neighbors’ patriotism and for their ignorance.
         1. I wish that the United States had a better understanding and importance put towards learning about other countries without war having their names appear. I don’t think I would have ever learned about Gandhi if it wasn’t for India’s civil war or about Israel’s and Palestine’s holy war.
2. Year’s End
   1. P. 256
      1. He had wasted no time giving away her clothes, her handbags, her boxes of cosmetics and colognes.
         1. Greif does a lot of things to people, but after years of marriage and having so many memories, I’ve always thought that it’s wrong for the spouse to throw away all of their physical memories. Their partner is gone, but not all of them has to be.
   2. P. 257
      1. “Be sure to keep my ruby choker and the pearl and…set something aside for the sake of my future happiness.
         1. The family heirlooms I have in my possession have been passed down in a similar way to this, “take what you can before I die and can’t give it to you.” Similar, and hopefully something that Kaushik won’t regret later.
   3. P. 264
      1. He glanced at Chitra, and after some small silent communication…fondness for Johnnie Walker, around me, around anyone.
         1. Having secrets from your spouse, even old habits, tend to come back up in times of stress or depression. While I’m sure that Kaushik’s father has good intentions, it’s bound for disaster later.
   4. P. 270
      1. “And I will be all right?” “What do you mean?” “I…added. “And that we will fall into the swimming pool.”
         1. One of my past professors told me that on her trips to India that she sees men masturbating in the streets, that if you get attacked in the street to scream as loud as you can so other women will run and come to help you. It’s fine if you’re a man, but a woman in India has to be careful. Of course, even in a different country, the fear still travels with her.
   5. P. 273 – 274
      1. Why didn’t you say anything?” I asked when they…in these situations, the better it will be. It’s already good.”
         1. From my experience in Japan, I know that you have to speak the surrounding language as much as possible. You can’t be silent and hope to not the wrong thing. Speaking is the best way to learn a language.
3. Going Ashore
   1. P. 295
      1. At this restaurant, the waitress knew by now to bring her a bottle of acqua gassata, a half-litre of vino bianco, swiftly to clear the second place setting away.
         1. Unless I’m a very high paying customer or my family owns the restaurant, I don’t know if it’s a good thing for the wait staff to know exactly what you’d like. Too much eating out and wasted money to me.
   2. P. 297
      1. She refused to think of it as an arranged marriage, but…believing Julian would leave his wife, she’s agreed.
         1. While I think that this the best situation for an arranged marriage, especially since they already know each other, having Hema wait for Julian just seems like the marriage isn’t good enough.
   3. P. 298
      1. After nearly a decade, a single phone conversation…her of deceiving him, called her heartless, and then he did not call again.
         1. I find the irony in Julian calling her heartless when he is a married man comical and hypocritical.
   4. P. 314
      1. In the morning, looking into the small mirror over…unbecoming proof, pleased that already he had marked her.
         1. As pleased as Hema is with this decision, I wouldn’t count someone’s first time (because that’s what it sounds like from here), as happy when now they have an STD to treat. Herpes isn’t exactly something people like to show off.

~ by Angelica Perez on May 27, 2019 . Tagged: Assignment, Talking Points