Inspired by:

“Maybe to be gone, to go, is to leave without a lifeline.”

By Chloe Marina

Less than six months ago, I walked out of my life.  Not only did I leave my own, but my family left theirs as well.  We had been living in South Dakota for a few years.  I had an amazing job.  It was an important position, one that is not that easy to come by.  I came home from work one day, and told my husband I couldn’t do it anymore.  It wasn’t really work that was the problem.  I thought I was going crazy – actual crazy.  My entire family was extremely sick and we didn’t know why or how.  Two days after we decided to say, “fuck it” and abandon our life in South Dakota, we learned what was making us sick.  It was our house; specifically, a gas leak.  We lived in a house with a gas leak for three months, if you can believe it.  It was a small leak, but it was being sucked into our ventilation system, and we were breathing it in through the air conditioner, 24-7.  Whatever the reason, it was the first time in my entire life, that I did something so huge, without a plan, without an excess of finances.  I was so desperate to be “gone”, I didn’t care about anything else.  We were homeless for three months after that.  I was depressed.  I think I still am.  I still feel “gone”.  I am not sure when I will return.