Week 6: How to condense a blog post you didn’t save, mini-grieve a thousand lost words and summarize the main points without the same amount of passion and energy.
My dumb ass lost the blog post I was working on and it was a long and good one too. So I’m not going to retype what I wrote. I’m going to like take a break and wait for the anger to go down.
Okay so like here were the main points of the post I made:
+I was super distraught and mindfucked while watching The Beautiful Country. I was fucking crying, I was literally hugging myself. After class I went to my journal and wrote my feelings.
+That night, Jackson and I did our own “Halloween” thing. We went to Trader Joe’s and bought a bunch of pumpkin stuff. I drew a face on the pumpkin he got last weekend and he carved it. I made fried rice with egg and spinach with tofu on the side for dinner. We had a nice night together that allowed me to step away from what was troubling me. Even though I didn’t tell him what was wrong, having that time with him was what I needed.
+The high point of that feeling came when Jackson picked me up from school and started driving: I started to disconnect myself from reality and stared into the sky. I told myself to “think of home” and that snapped me back to my body. I let myself cry for a little and then allowed myself to move on and go shopping. I didn’t stay in the distraught stage I was in before, knowing that I can come back to it, I can make space for it. Telling myself to think of home helped me move on and for that I’m thankful. It shows how important this project has become for me and how it will continue to be a part of my life when this program finishes.
+On Wednesday, I had my one on one with Kris. She is BRILLIANT and gave helpful feedback on my paper. The worst part is, I haven’t touched it since then. But I understand it because… like I had that student governance retreat from Thursday to Saturday. Then Saturday night Jackson and I went to Seattle for that ACLU fundraiser dinner. I GOT TO SEE ***LAVERNE COX**** SPEAK. It was a highlight of my life. Then Sunday we went food shopping, prepared pho and spring rolls for our friends who visited. And I’m catching up and finishing the last two blogs tonight. I do have the next two days to get right to the dirt and like…I hope I get to the writing mode because I really want to have a draft I’m proud of for peer-review. I can’t believe that’s all happening this week. Ah.
