Kitty Center

Hoooo-boy.

So the construction of this book has been put off until yesterday as I have been having a difficult time deciding on what it should even look like. I have been sketching ideas on notebook paper and nothing has really felt right. In the past few days I have been researching tintypes. I love the look of tin type. There is an element that feels as though you can touch the subject in a good tintype. Almost a 3d effect.  I had wanted to try to simulate miniature portraits photographically, but that didn’t feel right either. I looked into tintype process and it is expensive and requires a lot of practice, not to mention how dangerous the chemicals. So then I looked into making faux tintypes. Most of the digital examples of faux tintype effects I viewed seemed cheesy. Then I stumbled across a blog that mentioned printing onto transparencies and adhering them to foil, foil tape or mylar.

Here is a link to the basic instructions. I found that spray adhesive works much better than Mod Podge or Elmers, however, the white adhesives make a lot of artifacts that can be pretty cool but requires long drying time.

http://www.ehow.com/how_10066671_make-faux-tintype.html

After doing tests with different glues I did some more tests after I found I liked the spray adhesive. I used glass with the back painted gold and silver. The glass made the images very 3d and way too blurry.

I used the dull side of foil. One sheet painted gold and one unpainted. I printed images in color and in black and white onto a transparency and glued them to the foils. I rolled them with a rolling pin and let them dry.

I recently found these fantastic toaster oven guts (the pans) at Goodwill. They are aluminum and scratched and dulled. Inspired by tintypes I bought them thinking they would be great for faux tintypes. I plan to use them and I am holding off on a test mount until I can find some more lovely aluminum toaster oven pans. Foil is the back up plan if the result is not as lovely as the foil.  In person the foil mount tests are warm and rich, and the color prints are gem toned. I love them.

Once again I am having problems uploading photos. I am creating a tumbr so I can link y’all to photos but  I cannot get my email verified with them. I am not getting the verification email. Technical problems here…

Bennie invited me to have lunch with a friend of his. Her name is Alisa and he says that she is a good “junker”, meaning she scores great stuff thrift store shopping and knows all the good shops. We had a delightful lunch. Alisa is vibrant, hilarious, adorable, and just plain good people. She gave us a verbal list of places to junk.  I sorta got a little crush on her as I do with most amazing people I meet. I am the girl with gazillion crushes. I think that my tendency to crush out and celebrate the unique in people is what keeps my hope for humanity alive. In general I have a hard time dealing with other humans. I find them self serving which is the ultimate bore. Some people are iridescent stars that shine light wherever they go and leave a bit of stardust on those they touch. Alisa is one of those people. I was very fortunate that she invited us over to see her and her husbands house. Alisa greeted us with her magnetic smile and showed us around the yard. She loves clovers and collects four leaf clovers. The yard is huge and sparsely treed so there is a view.

Alisa said that she and her husband immediately knew that the house was their “home” as soon as they stepped inside. It is beautiful. Front and back porch, lots of ceiling to floor windows, an entire apartment in the basement, and a huge yard. The year the house was built is something I forgot to ask. The interior is designed with beautiful vintage and mid-century pieces that fit right into the house. Alisa does have junkin’ ju-ju.

So here is this amazing lady with this amazing house. It took me a while to connect that Alisa is a burlesque performer. I do not know why I did not make that connection as Bennie told me her name and I had seen pictures of  “Monique Honeybush”. I knew about the burlesque group “Panty Raid”.  Sometimes I can be a dullard but all too often ignorance has saved me from acting like a starstruck idiot around famous and/or fantastic people I have met. So bless my heart, right?

Alisa showed us her gorgeous house, her funeral fan collection, and her collection of hilarious and bad paintings. We even got to peek into her costume closet. Alisa’s two dogs and her elderly cat were so sweet. I wish I could have met her husband but he was at work.

Unfortunately the rest of my photos of Alisa’s place are too large of files to post here. I need to find out how to compress them for posting. Anyone else have to do this? Help please? BTW if you Google Image Monique Honeybush you will find fantastic pictures of Alisa performing!

Alisa showing Bennie, Janene, and me her yard.

Funeral fans

To me the word home means the place where I am comfortable and I feel the most if not truly like me. I have a few places and people I consider “home”.

It was an honor to stay with Bennie and Janene when I visited Nashville. I had never been to Bennie’s home and knowing what I know about Sideshow Bennie  I envisioned collections of very esoteric items spanning many interests. I was correct to a degree and upon taking a closer look at the items in Bennie and Janene’s home, I could see an epic narrative of three fascinating interwoven lives. Bennie and Janene have a daughter who grew up in the house.

I stayed in Larkens room, which is now the guest room. The walls are a bright yellow with shelves on the wall painted white and green. It’s a very retro feel, with framed Hindi deities hung linearly along the wall above the bed. Bennie said that Larken loved yellow so the room got painted bright yellow. On the shelves are family photo albums, beautiful sea shells, vintage knickknacks, and framed family photos.

While I unpacked I noticed a picture of my dog on the shelf, and then stepping closer, a picture of my partner and myself. Both were framed and propped on the shelf at eye level. I could see the photos while sitting in bed too. Janene later said that she does this for all her guests. They just get the photos off of Facebook and print them. She mentioned that she likes the idea of seeing them from the bed when you wake up. What a lovely touch of home for guests!

A touch of home.

Cozy and colorful. I loved this room.

Bennie and Janene made me feel at home like I have never felt at home other than my own home. By this I mean truly comfortable. I could ask for anything or help myself to just about anything. They both took time out of their busy schedules to spend time with me. Bennie drove me around Nashville and gave me my own private sight seeing tour chock full of  historical fact and personal anecdotes. We went out to eat, we walked around sites, we went to Cheekwood Museum, We called on friends. We hung out and did our own things around the house, we watched movies and TV. The cherry on top of the visit was Bennie’s cooking. As it turns out Janene has a masterful hand in the kitchen as well. They both made recipes gluten free for me as they know my diet restrictions. I gobbled down the gluten free Hello Kitty shaped cookies Janene baked for me. They were sort of like a sugar cookie and shortbread with cinnamon. Before I left Olympia I knew I would be taking the “When in Rome” attitude and eat bird and mammal meat during my visit.  I also did not want Bennie to make a tofu bastard of one of his brilliant pork recipes. I am confident he could carry it out beautifully with tofu but I felt it would be an insult to his experience and skill to present a task that actually snubs his talent.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is not for those with a growl in their belly. Proceed with caution. And do not lick the screen.

Some fine home cooked meals by Bennie and Janene:

Catfish with cornmeal breading, beans with homemade Tasso, and homemade coleslaw.

The beginnings of grits and gumbo

The conjuring of grits and gumbo

Bennie’s grits and Gumbo. I have been fortified.

Janene and her beautiful cake. She also made GF shortcake for me so I could have strawberry shortcake.

Smoked all night and ready for the oven. The man prepares pork with patience and love.

Pulled pork (smoked over night in Bennie’s portable smoker on the porch), homemade coleslaw, Bennie’s BBQ sauce, and a potato and cheese casserole of which I inhaled two servings.

Shortcakes cooling in the dining room.

Hmm, strangely I am getting hungry. I looked for a picture of the gluten free biscuits and gravy they made for breakfast with Bennie’s homemade sausage. Oh it was delightful and maybe too dangerous to post. It’s probably for the best that I can’t find the photo.

Update: I found the photo. Oh my stars!

Homemade GF biscuits and gravy with Bennie’s homemade sausage. Yes it is real butter.

Bennie and Janene’s home spoke of comfort and fun  as well as tradition and exploration. It turns out that the house itself was built by Bennie’s father.  Bennie grew up there and eventually returned to live there with Janene and raise their daughter there. Maybe it is Bennie’s sense of connection that makes the place feel grounded. Or that they have both lived there for so long. Maybe it’s just that Bennie and Janene are cool-cats and know how to make people feel comfortable. I appreciated the touches, like a small basket of travel size items on the dresser in case a guest forgets something.  I want to make others feel as good in my home as good as I felt in theirs. It was not only a delightful visit but a learning experience and I am grateful to Bennie and Janene.

On my flight from Salt Lake City to Nashville I sat next to Bruce.  I am calling him Bruce because he resembled a young Bruce Willis. Bruce is 5’6″ with an extremely muscular build. Two of my lower arms were equivalent in size to one of his lower arms. He wore an orange t-shirt and tan cargo shorts with grey New Balance cross trainers. He had stubble on is face. We started with light chat for a few minutes and our conversation quickly got deep. He’s a special forces army medic. He had been in Afghanistan this time for, I think he said, 15 months. He will be returning in a year after he completes more medical and language & culture training at Fort Campbell. His job will be to become immersed in the community his team are assigned and create a relationship of trust and cooperation so that they may better provide defense training and health care. Immersion requires that Bruce look the part. Bruce must look the part.  Bruce has to grow his facial hair and let his hair grow. He said that there are some things he finds frustrating in the culture he has experienced in Afghanistan. One of them is that when Bruce has tried to provide medical treatment to women and children the men will say that the women and children do not need it, to treat them instead. It’s a complicated situation bringing forth fear, trust, values, religion, pride, everything.

Bruce has shot and killed people. He has also saved people’s lives. He has experienced devastating loss. During an ambush a member of his team was shot several times and Bruce tried to save him. His team mate was also a good friend from high school. Bruce said that he did every possible thing to keep his friend alive for transport but he died. “After that” Bruce said, “Nothing could phase me anymore.”

Bruce shared with me details about some of the training he has had to endure. Part of his training has been to be captured by the “enemy” and interrogated and tortured. Because he managed to not give any information after hours of intense interrogation and torture ( including a broken finger)  he was placed in an underground box for over 24 hours. I am told that during torture exercises the torturers are allowed to break certain bones.

Bruce told me some things that were hard to  hear and not be judgmental about. He told me some things he preferred I not repeat and I agreed to respect that.

He said that Afghanistan is nothing like the media portrays. He said people are so kind and generous with the little they have it’s humbling. He shared his sentiment that American civilians have no clue what it is like unless they have family that is military. I think what he meant was that we haven’t walked in his shoes. I would not want to walk in his shoes.

Bruce is single. His military career has cost him a marriage because he is away from home all the time. I asked Bruce if he was without a home since he was away for so long and leaving again. He said he owns a house close to Fort Campbell and that he will be living in his house again and not on base.  He seemed very happy about living in his house again.

When Bruce spoke about being part of a community in Afghanistan and providing health care for them his eyes lit up and he talked with a smile. I asked him why he chose the Army and he said “Because I love it.” Then he said “I love helping people.” This is what he does http://www.goarmy.com/special-forces/primary-missions/foreign-internal-defense.html

Bruce, a bright, funny, caring, intelligent, life saving human being who has also cold bloodily killed other human beings in the name of self defense in a war.  We have all accepted this irony.  When societies construct reasons to kill one another systematically there is no escape from irony.

I feel lucky to have met Bruce and heard his story. We talked from Salt Lake City to Nashville. We talked all the way to baggage claim where we hugged and said goodbye.

It’s a big world.

Mt Rainier from Delta window seat.

I got lights: LimoStudio 6500K Day Light 400 Watt Photography 33″ Silver Reflector Umbrella Continuous Photo Lighting Kit, AGG287.

As soon as I got the lights  I set only one up and took pix of Larry. Update: In trying to figure out how to insert a gallery as I have exceeded my storage on WordPress..I deleted the photo pf the Larry.

Here’s a pic of myself.  I did forget to set the white balance on my camera and no editing, so these are shot on auto and they are straight out of camera. Yeah, just one light at night with the blinds closed. Pretty nifty huh? Looks like daylight to me.

Here is what one of the light units look like. It is not fully extended.

This light kit seems great for what I need it for now. They are in no way rickety, but I do feel that the stands could not withstand continuous rugged travel. I have a third stand exactly like the light stands and I got it to hold a boom for my reflectors. The stands must be weighted outside. A light breeze will take them down if they are not weighted. I think they will last longer if they are mostly used in a stationary setting.  I am learning to use new equipment and it is pretty fun as well as frustrating.

I also purchased reflectors. I tested one when it was still light outside and it was very helpful. The rectangular five in one is alright. The round reflector gold side throws sunlight really well. I do not have a photo of that yet.

I still do not quite have the hang of my light meter.

I have bad shooting habits.  I forget that I can meter and adjust controls on my camera because I have been shooting in auto for so long. I still feel like “when in doubt shoot in auto”.

I am relearning how to use my Nikon D3000. I am realizing now that I want to upgrade when I can afford it. I would like to buy a Nikkor lens with a wider aperture. With a wider aperture one can shoot in low light with a higher shutter speed.   Mine only goes to f 3.5.

There is so much to know and so much to do.

Weekend before last I met two people and their chairs.

I answered an ad on Craigslist for an Italian leather chair for sale. I like the way it looked in the picture so I called to arrange to look at it.  I drove to a duplex in Lacey and knocked on the door. Deborah was very energetic, loud, small, and powerful. I entered her home and immediately fell in love with the chair. It is big and soft and comfy. Deborah being a small woman appeared tiny in this huge Italian leather chair. It seemed like an unlikely chair for her. I would look at her and imagine something smaller and daintier. Deborah told me about how she just bought a $48,000.00 RV and is selling everything in her home and will be living in the RV. Her husband is in the military and they have to move to Virginia soon. She explained that every time they have to move they have to pay first/last/deposit for wherever they live and it makes more sense to have an RV. She showed me the brochure for it. Let me tell you, she bought a HOME.

Deborah told me that she is really attached to the chair. It is her “Zen” chair. She is a nanny by profession and she used the chair as her sanctuary, curling up in it with her kindle book and her electric fireplace glowing at her feet. She expressed happiness knowing that the chair was going to a good home where it will be loved.

As we talked she shared with me how she had been hit by a car a few years ago and badly injured. She spent two years in therapy. She said she had to learn to walk. She shared how she grew up hunting and that she is still an avid hunter. She said that if you can’t skin a deer yourself you have no business hunting. I love her zest. Sitting on her bed (she toured me around the duplex too) listening to how excited she was to get out of Olympia and be on the road made me little envious. However, I am not sure I would have the moxie or gas money to drag an entire house with me across the US.

So here is this woman embarking on a major geographical and lifestyle change. She is letting go of dear material possessions so that she can travel less burdened. Dear Deborah, you tackle big things and I respect you for it. I bet you could take down a Grisly with a “Boo!”.

Yes, I bought the chair. It is lovely.

The next day I took my dogs to a field by some new construction near Capitol Medical Center. There was a man sitting in a wheelchair talking on a cell phone on the side of the dead end road. I parked and asked him quietly if it was okay to run my dogs in the field. He said “Yeah! Go ahead!”.

So ran out into the field with Gus and Larry and played for awhile. Gus was intrigued with the guy in the wheelchair as we came back to the car. He started yowling in a high pitch and wagging his tail. I asked the guy if he could say hi to him and the guy welcomed us over.

His name is Richard. He is a resident of an assisted living facility across the street and was diagnosed with lung cancer three months ago.  I sat down on the pavement and talked with him for a while. I wanted to know what the assisted living facility is like because my brother may eventually need assisted living. According to Richard, who had come from a big house with his wife and two of his grown children living there, the one room space isn’t bad. He told me that he isn’t here for long so why complain. Richard said that he gets out and about and his wife visits him and brings his dog to see him.  I asked him “Are you doing stuff?” and he knew exactly what I meant. He replied “Some people have a bucket list. I don’t. I’ve done it. I have had three lives.” He then told me about his early years as a basketball hopeful until his thumbs were crushed. He did not tell me how they were crushed. But looking at his thumbs I noticed they were unusually large and guessed that they had once been his or someones toes. Maybe it was big scar tissue from grafting. I didn’t stare or ask. I felt fortunate that he was sharing with me at all. He described his years following the Grateful Dead. Later he got a degree and worked as a computer programmer for years. I suspected there was more and asked him if he rode bikes. Yes indeed he did. He was a biker too. He also said he did some logging. Richard is 55 years old and I totally believe him. Sometimes I look back on all the amazing things I have experienced and marvel at how it all got crammed into so few years. He told me that he is looking forward to seeing what death is like. Richard said he thought about suicide and that he just can’t do it. I shared with him about how my uncle, who was dying of lung cancer, had driven himself to his favorite fishing hole with his rifle and drank a bottle of whiskey on the shore and couldn’t do it. He was found passed out with his rifle.

I asked Richard  about the wheelchair. He said that because he is on oxygen he needs it to roll the tank around outside. He also added that it provides a seat anywhere he walks. He wasn’t happy about it at first but now he likes having it with him because of the seat.  Our chat came to an end and I thanked him for sharing with me.  Richard stood up from the wheelchair. He is tall. I mean freakishly tall. I didn’t see it when he was seated, even when he mentioned he was a basketball hopeful. He looked so meek and sickly and crumpled into the wheelchair. He stood tall and rolled the chair away. I think that chair skewed my perception.

I suspect that was the first and very last time I will see Richard. Death is part of who we all are. Here is a man embarking on a new life journey. Both Deborah and Richard have let go of dear material objects and adapted to a smaller domestic space.  Richard and Deborah have both found comfort in unlikely chairs.  I sincerely wish them both safe and fantastic journeys.

I have been stumbling around trying to figure out how to teach myself something I need to know about lighting. I am going to tell you about my process so far. Equipment and accessory acquisition seems to have taken forever. I am still waiting for stuff to arrive UPS.

I have purchased so far an on camera flash diffuser, an air blower, lens cloths, a Sekonic light meter, Bescor LED light, adapter for light, two different sizes of reflectors. I need to order or make a bender for my strobe. I am considering buying a new strobe. Mine is old and cheap.

Above is what I have been using to take pictures.

Here are some of the mentioned additions.

So I thought I would test out the on camera flash diffusers at 400 iso, 1/40 shutter, and f-3.5.

Without diffuser:

With white diffuser:

With yellow diffuser:

With blue diffuser:

I found the diffusers to mute the light so I tried a lower shutter speed with lighter results.  iso400, 1/30 shutter, and f-3.5.

With white diffuser:

With yellow diffuser:

With blue diffuser:

It’s pretty neat. I went to a wedding on Sunday and used the white diffuser for the first time. It did a good job. I usually get really washed out skin with my on camera flash. I also get the moans from my subjects being blinded by my flash. The diffuser helped with that a little bit. Here is an out of camera shot I took at the wedding with the white diffuser. Now I did not use manual mode because the light was really low and I wanted to capture as much as possible without thinking so I set the camera  mode on auto.

At the wedding:

I like how the diffuser allows their skin to look real and healthy and not like washed out vampire demons emerging  from the darkness.

This is what the room looked like without flash:

There was a photographer there. I spoke with him about chatting about lighting at a later time. He agreed to meeting me at some point and discussing lighting. He said that he was disappointed that he had to use flash for the event but he made the best of it and rigged a bounce for his strobe. I am looking forward to seeing his results.

Hey Everybody!

I love fire performance. I love sideshow performance. Fire performance is usually part of the sideshow. When I lived in NYC (prior to my circus times) I would train out to Coney Island to watch Sideshows by the Seashore. I was fascinated with the performers. I wanted to know them but I was too afraid. I wasn’t afraid of them.  I was afraid that I would not be good enough for them. They possessed magic powers to me.

Now, before I tell you about my time in the circus, I would like to say that I am not circus. I would like to be but I am not. My time in the circus was brief and I do not recall a lot about it, especially the lingo. In 1993 I ran away and joined the Big Apple Circus due to some friends I have who got me a job on tent crew. The plan was for me to work on tent crew and then eventually work with my friends who were groomers for the horse act.  I took the Greyhound from Seattle to Queens and there I filled out paperwork and got my Circus I.D. (You will notice a different first name. This is my former name and is no longer legal or valid)

After reuniting with my friends I went straight to “work”.  I had arrived in time to see the second show of the day. It was explained to me that my job was to operate the “back flap” during performances so I must watch the show and pay attention to the live band during the show and identify the music cues for performer and animal entrances and exits.

Basically, I was a doorman for the performers. But it was critical to keep the tent flaps closed tight and opened and closed as quickly as possible for the performers. The elephants would head for any light once they were backstage. The underwater scene required pitch black so me and my two other tent crew members would sprint around the big top at a certain music cue and lower the venting flaps to shut out light. The underwater scene was a great glow in the dark kaleidoscope of dancing and acrobatics to the tune “Under the Sea”.  Most of the performers were from overseas (har-dee-har-har). Malaysia, Czechoslovakia, what was Yugoslavia, Russia, etc.  I learned the music cues quickly and developed a silent repertoire with the performers, who were always gracious and would give me a smile. There were acrobats, jugglers, contortionists, aerialists, dogs, horses, elephants, and two clowns, Gordo, the star of the show, and Mr. Fish.

Mr. Fish was American born and a philosophy professor who decided that he was happiest clowning. I have long forgotten his real name and most of the details of his story. He was very gentle and kind. He  helped me to navigate how to behave with the performers. You see, performers really had nothing to do with staff. They were a kind of royalty and did not associate or socialize with any of us. I was told by Mr. Fish to just not talk. He said they hated loud Americans and if I am silent and polite they will like me. It totally worked.

There were three two hour shows a day if I recall correctly. The rest of the time was maintenance type work and the inevitable  tear down, location site marking, and putting the tent up when we would haul to another burrough in NYC.  Everyone had a job during tear down and raising the big top. I worked with two guys that I did not get along with. They did not appreciate the supervisor hiring a woman onto tent crew, and I was punk rock, and they were hicks. I was up for the challenge. I spent my fair share on top of the tent with my tent crew cursing and screaming at one another and threatening to release each others  carabiners. It really was a fun time when I look back on it. We were freely expressing our hate for each other and it was rather healthy.

The constant feeling of magic began to ebb. The bad food and the hate between me and my crew members  finally got to me. When we went to Dublin Ohio I could not take it any longer. My supervisor had screamed at me for being late for raising the big top. I was in a separate car for the caravan and we had stopped to see some of their friends in a little town on the way.  I was screamed at for the last time. I quit the circus and so did my friend Theo. We spent a week in Columbus Ohio exploring and trying to get a ride share to the west coast but then we hopped a Greyhound to Seattle.

There is a great documentary series on PBS about the BAC  http://www.pbs.org/opb/circus/big-apple-circus/

After that adventure I was hooked on all things circus and sideshow. I wanted to learn to eat fire. Jim Rose’s Sideshow was taking off and strangely I ended up moving next door to one of their performers Tim Cridland. I learned to eat and manipulate fire from him. After we had been friends for a while he knocked on my door one sunny day and asked if I would take pictures of him swallowing a sword.  He was at the skill level where he could keep it down for some time and he wanted a photo. In the yard between our houses, he took a sip of water and plunged the sword down his throat. I snapped a photo just as he had removed the sword to projectile vomit the water. He was having a hard time. I kept snapping as he was having to remove it. It was rather funny. Finally he was able to keep it down long enough for me to get a photo. It was his camera and I never did see the pictures. There must be several photos of him projectile vomiting water into the air. Since then Tim has become highly skilled at what he does. He has spent years and years practicing these things and what he does is very dangerous. He is known as Zamora, the Torture King http://www.mindandmatter.net/ 

After a photo of me eating fire was published in a free publication in Seattle I was  contacted by a belly dancer and her band about performing fire with them. I joined Sahar’s Kundalini Theatre. We were live music, belly dance, and fire eating. I did not belly dance. Sahar would have guest dancers perform with her. I would eat and manipulate fire while she and other dancers would change costumes. We performed at restaurants and opened for bands in clubs. We performed at  a benefit for Hemp-Fest at a loft in SoDo. We also did Seattle Mediterranean Festival in ’98. It was great fun. I quit the troupe because my private life was going down the toilet. That’s a whole other story.

I did not breathe fire as part of my act in the past.  I  felt it was too dangerous. I had only learned to eat fire and do fire manipulations from Tim. I was too afraid to breathe fire after an attempt on my own that scared me.

In 2011 I saw a fire troupe perform in Tumwater. I approached them about practicing and learning new things. I ended up joining and performing with Midgard’s Flame. Thanks to the matriarch and patriarch of that troupe I learned how to become a competent and confident fire breather and I became a better performer.

First of all I have to scream this at the top of my lungs: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. Sideshow performers are trained and experienced professional performers. If you want to learn how to do these sort of acts I urge you to find someone who is a professional sideshow performer who is willing to mentor you. Never do any of these stunts alone or without proper training and safety gear. Just don’t. That being screamed at you, here we go ladies and gentlemen. This is not for the faint of heart.

Among my top favorite sideshow acts involving items commonly found in domestic space are the Human Cutting Board. This sideshow act employs a cutting knife and a cucumber within the parameters of their purpose, however they are used a bit out of context. The cutting board for this act is the human spine. The performer places themselves on all fours with their bare back as level as possible to emulate a cutting board. The cucumber is then gingerly sliced in the style of professional chef along the spine of the human cutting board by another performer. This act is visually disturbing as the knife is usually an over sized demonstratively sharp vegetable knife. I do not know how the bare skin on the back does not get cut. and I don’t want to know. It’s better that way.

My very favorite act using common household items is the Human Blockhead. A nail is pounded into the nostril using a standard hammer. Blockheads utilize nails, screw drivers, forks, curling irons, butter knives etc. I have seen people do the Human Blockhead using custom spiraled metal attached to a drill. I am not so sure how to feel about taking what is already very disturbing to watch and adding complication to it. The beauty of the traditional human blockhead is that we are unnerved by what we do not see. We see the body of the nail pounded inside the performers head but we do not see where it goes. Some acts insert items that come out the other side. Nice, gross, but there is a thin line between an entertaining and fascinating act and an anatomy lesson. To slip an item into the nasal cavity and show it coming out some other hole takes a lot of skill and practice, but it also takes the other aspects of showmanship out of the act. Build up and drama are essential to the sideshow. I want to pay for my whole seat and only use the edge. I want to see that nail excruciatingly pounded into the performers head, and I want to imagine where it went and what membranes it may be rupturing. Once the mystery of the human interior is revealed during the act  it loses it’s captivating charm for me. Speaking of captivating charm. I am very excited to visit Sideshow Bennie and Anna Fiametta in Nashville. I will be photographing them in their homes as part of my project. They are good people and they have a lovely sideshow that is a beautiful mix of comedy, burlesque, gross out, scary, and fun.