“And there are new kinds of nomads, not people who are at home everywhere, but who are at home nowhere. I was one of them.”
-Robyn Davidson, Tracks
“The two important things that I did learn were that you are as powerful and strong as you allow yourself to be, and that the most difficult part of any endeavour is taking the first step, making the first decision.”
-Robyn Davidson, Tracks
Touchdown in Laredo, a town along the Camino Norte, just outside of Bilbao. Today’s 8 hour bus ride to here from Santiago included sights of the lush green mountains I’ll be trekking through the next three weeks or so. It was very strange to be in a vehicle again, with scenery whizzing by several miles an hour. Getting off the bus was comical and embarrassing- it was like having sea legs. I was bumping my head on doors and tripping over everything.
I’ve spent the last few days getting very excited to be starting another Camino. I want to continue to meet people and do so independently…but I’m more nervous than I thought I would be. I’ve walked a thousand kilometers across Spain, but I always had someone I knew with me. Now, it’s just me. For the first time in two months, I am completely alone. It’s very exciting, and it’s what I wanted. But after walking through this quiet town at sunset and checking into a cheap one-bed room hostel to get a good nights sleep, I can’t help but feel terribly lonely.
This is one of the first times on this trip when I’ve felt really homesick. I know that home is just a phone call away, but nothing replaces a warm hug from a loved one. Today is my brother’s sixteenth birthday, and more than anything I wish I was with him. I miss him and my family and my home more than ever- it really hurts.
But I’m here.
I’m alive.
And I’m going to keep walking.
I think I’ve nearly overstayed my welcome here in Santiago.
I’m staring to feel the wanderlust kicking in, but I’m also appreciating this time to catch up on my sleep, get some stuff organized, and recover from my cold.
As the program has come to an end, I’ve had to say my goodbyes to my classmates and my wonderful and loyal traveling partner, Jess. It’s an exciting but bittersweet time. I’m so excited for Jess to go onwards and continue her travels throughout Europe with her family, but being without her feels so strange! After spending two whole months together inseparably, having her gone feels like I’m missing a limb. I’m honestly feeling quite discombobulated.
I took another rest day here in Finisterre, and had some time to do some grounding and preparing for this next stage. I’m staying in a beautiful hostel, where I had a lovely and insightful tarot card reading, a warm vegetarian meal with many thankful pilgrims, and a full moon meditation.
I’m feeling the shift towards a new chapter in my journey- one towards a growth in self trust and reliance, cultivating and listening to my inner voice and guidance, and embracing change as it comes. It’s time to stop comparing myself to others, to heal old wounds, and to open up and share what I have to offer to the world.
So thankful for this time and place to come back to my center and set new intentions for the next part of my travels and onward!